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overwhelming

Lots is going on right now. Not exactly baby wise but that seems to fall into everything. School as been really busy these past few weeks and just when we would finish one thing it was already onto the next. We are also really tired from a busy, emotional weekend in Ponoka. This weekend proved to keep with the trend as The Utilities (Blair’s band) played a show Friday night, Saturday night and then Blair played worship and I taught for Kids Gate early Sunday morning. Let’s just say I just woke up from a very long nap!

Thursday and Friday I was feeling sick so that was not so good. My legs were really achy and my stomach really hurt so that freaked me out. I felt fine when I woke up Thursday but after (more like during) a presentation I was giving for class I started to feel exhausted and dizzy. Blair was amazing and went home to get the car to pick me up while I laid on some chairs at the school.
After laying in bed all day Thursday I thought I would be fine for school Friday but after getting to class I was sick again. People were so caring. Praying for us, dropping off goodies and even a nice home cooked meal. We have the best friends.

The first thoughts that cross through my head are paranoia filled ones worrying that something is wrong with Baby Stretch. It is obviously my first baby so I don’t know what to expect so I MIGHT have over thought things a bit. I knew I was supposed to feel pain as the baby was stretching my body but I didn’t know how long to wait before doing something about it. I was pretty calm and logical for the most part but Friday afternoon I was sitting in bed and started to ‘freak out’ a bit. I put my hand on my stomach for probably 5 seconds (but it felt like forever) and when the baby didn’t kick I started to tear up at the thought of bad things that could happen. As a tear was about to fall down my cheek I feel my phone vibrate and it was Blair checking up on how I was doing. I said “good” like I usually do when I don’t really want him to know I am crying. Of course he somehow knew right away something was up. I was so amazed at God’s timing it was unbelievable. He of course made me feel better and I realized I was over reacting.

God spoke to Blair in a fairly direct way later that day. He put his head on my belly and asked God to let the baby kick so he would know it was alright. God said Blair had to trust him and Blair was a bit taken aback. Once Blair agreed he felt the baby kick. From that point forward we have really been trusting God with the precious gift he has given us and know that he is in control. It is a very humbling experience especially when today’s society puts so much pressure on people working things out for themselves. Pregnant mom’s have a lot of pressure from multiple sources to do everything from eating well to playing soundtracks to your belly to make your baby smart. I feel an incredible amount of joy knowing God is in control, he can see the big picture, and that he has great plans for us no matter what.

God has already taught us so much through this little one and we look forward to the many lessons we will continue to learn through him/her.

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We actually got this for a friend’s baby but we ended up not passing it on so when we found out we were pregnant it worked well! Talking to my sister the other day she said she just wanted to hold the baby and I was like… I want to hold it too! I am excited for when it can come out into the world and will fit in it’s cute little clothes.

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4 thoughts on “overwhelming

  1. Where is the onesie from?!!!!! LOVE it!!! I hope you feel better, those stretching pains are really scary sometimes because they’re new and you don’t know what’s normal and what’s not!

  2. It is so stressful to grow a baby, especially if you get sick or your health is compromised in any way. When I was pregnant with Liam, God told me to give the baby up to him. I didn’t understand, but I did. Then a few days later my appendix burst, I had emergency surgery and my 18 week baby was in grave danger. I knew I had already given him to God but it was sure scary. After all was over and the baby was ok, I felt God “give” him back to me. God is so good and has all these little ones in His hands. We’re praying for you guys. xox

    1. Yes, Ann told me about your appendix, that is crazy! And yes, it would still be scary. Thanks for the encouragement though, I appreciate it. Since that ‘time’ we have been focusing a lot on giving the baby up to God and it feels easier now than it did at first. It is nice to know God is in control and takes care to precious lives.

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